Lisa Barry: Have you ladies ever thought about how your attitudes affect your femininity? What I mean is--what do the clothes you put on say about you? Are you someone who likes to hang around in sweatpants and slippers--but you think other women should take better care of their appearance? And what about housework? We know it's something that needs to be done, but are we better at finding excuses than we are for doing the task? Am I striking a familiar chord with any of you?

Well, Elisabeth Elliot is someone who can offer some practical advice on this very important subject of femininity. Let's hear what she has to say.

Elisabeth Elliot: "You are loved with an everlasting love." That's what the Bible says. "And underneath are the everlasting arms." This is your friend, Elisabeth Elliot, talking this week about fathers and mothers.

I told you about a wonderful family named the McKims. Julie and Ken McKim have thirteen children whom they have raised obviously with good humor, with a whole lot of prayer, and with discipline. It was very obvious that they were a very well behaved, well trained, cheerful family.

Another thing that I noticed about them was femininity. The McKim girls seemed to have a certain reserve. Mystery--my mother called it, as we used to talk about what it means to be a lady. A certain reserve, a distance, a poise, a calm. Any measure that I have of that, I believe I learned from my mother. She was a lady. She tried to make us two girls ladies.

The McKim girls were dressed femininely. In my opinion, that's much more important nowadays than it has ever been, because we have easily absorbed the unisex frame of mind. We've fallen for the equality thing--something Jesus never sought. He never even asked for equality with His Father, although the three persons of the Trinity, we are told, are coequal. The Bible says that He considered it not something to be grasped at.

Note, you fathers: true masculinity is taught by example. Are you teaching your boys what it means to be a man? I have written a book called The Mark of a Man on the subject of masculinity, because I could see that the feminist movement was really doing a job on both men and women, confusing everyone about what it means to be a man or a woman.

Of course, my emphasis is a man or a woman of God. God was the One who thought up the idea of male and female. He created both in the image of God, but He created us under two separate modalities. It takes both man and woman adequately to represent the image of God.

Because so much in our world today has become unisex, I urge women to emphasize in their wardrobe the specifically feminine things. I'm not saying that I consider it wrong to wear shorts or slacks, but I do want to say, "Why not choose the things which are distinctly feminine, unless it's necessary to wear a pair of blue jeans?" If you are a cowgirl, for example, then you have to ride horseback. And if you are working in the garden, there are certainly occasions when it does help to have trousers on. When my husband and I walk in the sleet or the snow, here in Magnolia, Massachusetts, I wear a pair of old slacks on a day like that.

But as I look around my audiences, very often I see that there are many sweatshirts and sweat pants, many T-shirts and items, which really are cross-sexual. So let's be women for the glory of God.

I have a poem here called "Motherhood," showing two sides of the question. The author is unknown, so I'm sorry I can't give credit. The one side says this:

I guess we know that this poem must have been written a long time ago. I think modern housewives haven't a clue what bluing is. But I remember it.

Now there is a lot of truth in that side, isn't there? But there's another side.

This poem certainly expresses two very different attitudes toward what has always been called women's work. I define women's work as the kind of work that nobody notices, as long as you do it, but the whole world is going to notice if you don't do it.

Now I do housework. I want it to be known that I'm not just a writer and a talker. I do housework, and I love it. In fact, I consider it the best part of the jobs that I do. I know that that's a very unpopular position to take in today's world. Women are supposed to hate housework and get somebody else to do it, if they can. But I love to be able to offer up all that I do to the Lord, and all that I do includes shopping and cleaning and ironing and washing and hanging the clothes on the line.

And may I say here that I have a most unusual husband, who told me from the very beginning of our marriage that he was raised in a family where men cleaned the floors. Women were never expected to clean the floors. Do you suppose I ever quarreled with Lars over that one? I never did. He also insists on helping me hang up the clothes, which I think is extremely kind of him. I try not to ask him to do it, but he volunteers every time. So I'm very grateful for that.

I want you to know also, though, that there are other kinds of work that I do besides housework, one of them of course being preparing talks for Gateway To Joy.

I have a computer on which I write my books and I found this quotation from Jeremy Taylor, who lived 1613 to 1667. I've pasted this little quotation on the frame of my computer screen. He says, "When Thou shalt call me from this deliciousness of employment, may I pass into the employments of saints and angels."

"When Thou shalt call me from this deliciousness of employment, may I pass into the employment of saints and angels." I have to confess that I don't really know what Jeremy Taylor's employments might have been, other than his writings. But this was so apropos to my writing that I thought, This is a good place to stick it, right there on the frame of my computer screen.

It isn't by any means always delicious to me to sit down to write. In fact, I would say that that practically never describes how I feel about the process of writing. It's hard. It's sweaty work. But I do have to say that when the piece is done and has been edited and rewritten as many times as I can rewrite it, then it is delicious to have done it, isn't it?

And maybe there are some women listening to me today who would say, "Well, I really hate housework, but I do love to see a clean house." It's possible to learn to like what you have to do. If you can't do what you like, learn to like what you do and do it for Jesus.

Lisa Barry: Well it's been a great series so far, and I hope you've found many new ideas to apply to your life. We aim to be practical. After all, if what you hear doesn't change your heart and your conduct, then we're just kicking up a lot of dust. The Bible calls it chaff and it's of no value at all. Instead, our prayers for this program are that the things that we're talking about are the very things you need to hear about. We want God to use this program to plant seeds of obedience in you--seeds that will grow up and produce spiritual fruit. We feel accountable for our investment in you and we pray that you'll feel the same sort of accountability toward us.

If Gateway To Joy is making a difference in your walk with God and your relationship with others, I hope you'll consider supporting this ministry with your prayers and financial gifts. If you'd like to contact us, here's our address: Gateway To Joy, Box 82500, Lincoln, NE 68501. Our toll-free number is 1-800-759-4JOY. Call any time day or night, 1-800-759-4569. Or dial up our Web site at gatewaytojoy.org. Gateway To Joy has been a production of Back to the Bible.

Tomorrow Elisabeth talks more about the failure of feminism, so be sure to join us then for the next Gateway To Joy.