Lisa Barry: What are the best memories you have of your father growing up? I think mine were Saturday mornings when Dad would make pancakes and sausage for my sister and I. Or maybe it was when I was helping him around the house. Of course, I use the term "helping" loosely. The bottom line was, Dad liked having me around and I knew it.

Well, as you look back on your own childhood and then to the present, maybe you'll find a word of direction or wisdom that you can apply to your own situation. Today on Gateway To Joy, Elisabeth talks about the importance of establishing priorities. Let's get started.

Elisabeth Elliot: "You are loved with an everlasting love." Did you know that? That's what the Bible says. "And underneath are the everlasting arms." This is your friend, Elisabeth Elliot, talking again today about fathers and mothers.

Yesterday I told you about that remarkable family named McKim. Ken and Julie McKim have thirteen children. We met them just by, I would say, by chance, but I'm sure it was by divine providence, in Dallas one day. We were just overwhelmed with the impression of a really close-knit, godly, fun family. There was nothing reserved or reticent about those young men and women. I think the ages go from 27 down to 3, or something like that.

Then I read a story by Anita Carmen, telling about her little boy when his father went away on a business trip. He had told his little boy that he could call him anytime he needed him. So the little boy, forgetting the time change, called his father at what was 2:00 in the morning in Belgium. His mother, of course, chided him about that. But then she realized how important it was for that little boy to know that he could always talk to his father, and so she went ahead and repeated the call. The call had not gone through. The operator undoubtedly had recognized the child's voice, and she said since it was 2:00 in the morning that they wouldn't put it through. But then Anita herself got on the phone and called the father and of course let the little boy talk to him then.

This is the next part of her story.

"For Father's Day, I decided to make a book for the children that captured their relationship with their dad. So I went through the photo albums and randomly pulled out photographs. As I placed the photographs next to each other, I realized that in the flurry of everyday activities, we often miss the greatest story ever told--the story that is written in our children's hearts through what we do with them, not just what we say to them.

"The story is so simple and so profound. It's nothing that would make headline news, and yet it is the story recorded in heaven of building blocks planted by a father in the lives of the children entrusted to him from above. It's the story of a father who takes time.

"But more than that, in our case, it is the story not only of a father, but an executive of one of the largest companies in the world, a businessman with worldwide responsibilities and pressures. Therefore, it is the story of a father who makes time to validate feelings and to affirm again and again to his children, 'I see you. I love you. You mean the world to me.'

"Bob is an executive with Exxon chemicals. He's responsible for the worldwide planning of computer technology for his company. His job requires much travel, as he coordinates the computer technology of different geographical locations. His most recent company evaluation described him as a role model in various areas of leadership and competence.

"One of his secretaries said to me one day, 'It's very unusual for an executive at Bob's level to take the time he does for his family. I really admire him for that.'

"His subordinates and peers have also commented positively about his priorities. Once Bob was trying to reach a subordinate and his peer said, 'Call him in the evenings at about 7:00.'

"Bob said, 'I can't call him at 7:00. That's the time I'm playing basketball with my kids.'

"His peer laughed and said, 'That's what I would be doing, too.'

"I always knew Bob's priorities, and yet it brought tears to my eyes to have the evidence of his priorities stare me in the face through the photographs I randomly took over the years. A picture is worth a thousand words, and in those photographs I saw the story. It was not a glamorous story. It was simply a consistent message of love that repeated itself over and over again. 'You are important and I'm here for you.'

"The story that went with the photographs read, 'Dads are for feeding. Dads are for cleaning. Dads are for carrying, for working and paying. Dads are for teaching. Dads are for sharing. Dads are for fixing, for comfort and caring. Dads are for games, for birthdays, for festivals, for dares of all sizes. But most of all, dads are for dreaming, trusting, praying, believing, hugging and loving, the way only a Dad can do.'

"Bob loves to play golf, but he recently turned down an opportunity to go on a company weekend golf excursion. When I asked him why, he said, 'It's important to my boys that I be with them. They look forward to the weekends. As long as they want me here, I want to be here for them. One day they won't want to be around me anymore. Then I'll go and play golf.'

"How could life be so simple? But perhaps life is simple when the priorities are clear. As I go up and down my roller coaster of balancing the demands on my time from children, husband, career, church and friends in crisis, I see my husband sail above the turbulence. As I find my emotions stretched like a rubber band from absorbing the pain of all those who seek my time, I see my husband playing baseball with the boys in the yard.

"Part of me accuses him of being insensitive, of not responding to those in need, of not being normal in the way he simply blocks out the world. But the other part of me is green with envy because he not only says the words, but he lives the words: God first, family second and work third. Friends and the world take a low fourth in the priority, and never at the expense of the first three. 'My best contribution to the world,' he says, 'is to make sure my own kids are fine.'

"Recently I dragged my two boys with me as I went shopping for a gift. They were tired, hungry and bored. One played quietly in the aisle, while the other rolled his coat in a bundle, sat on it and closed his eyes to rest. As I watched my boys, I thought, 'Where did they learn to be so patient? Where did they learn to be so uncomplaining and kind to their mother?'

"Then I knew. They learned it from Dad. Always kind, always patient, never critical or condemning. 'Learn to wait,' I heard him teach them one day, 'because you'll be doing lots of it.' He didn't say those words in a sarcastic way, but simply as a statement of fact. So they wait because Dad waits. When Mom is through, Dad simply says, 'Did you find what you needed?' If the answer is no, he'll say, 'Don't worry, Honey. You'll find it.'

"I remember telling Bob that day how patient the kids were. He didn't say anything, but I noticed that he had a beam in his countenance. He always beams when life is going his way. He never calls attention to his accomplishments, but I knew and he knew that he had reached a milestone in his training of the children.

"He always said, 'The best way I can show I love my wife is to teach my children how to love their mother.'

"Sometimes I wonder in our desire to accomplish big things, in our zeal to make a difference, have we lost sight of what really matters? Perhaps we will find our glory when we no longer seek it. Perhaps it's in our quiet consistence that we will make our greatest statement. Perhaps it's tending those relationships closest to home that we will make the greatest difference.

"Robbie and Thomas both say, 'When I grow up, I want to be just like my Dad.' Out of the mouth of babes, the truth rings for all the world to hear. A man is greatest when he is great in the eyes of his children. The world cannot offer him a greater honor.

"As our children grow, my husband dreads the day that they will leave the nest, but he knows that one day that day will come. He knows, too, that so much lies ahead of them that we cannot control or anticipate.

"The best gift we can give them is a solid foundation and a trust in earthly parents that they will later transfer to a trust in their Heavenly Father. The sooner we put their hands in the hands of their Heavenly Father, the sooner we are assured of their security because we know we cannot be here forever.

"Only He can walk with them into their future. Only He can sustain them in their trials. Only He can give them wisdom for their choices. We pray that when that day comes, they will run to Him and be able to say as they do now, 'If I can just get to my Dad, everything will be all right.'"

Let me read from Deuteronomy 6 (vs. 4-11), several verses here for fathers particularly.

"Hear, O Israel: the LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

"When the LORD your God brings you into the land He swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you...be careful that you do not forget the LORD, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery."

It's my prayer today that you fathers will realize what a burden of spiritual responsibility God has assigned to you. Have you shouldered it?

Lisa Barry: That's a question whose answer should be determined in prayer. Well, as we get closer to Father's Day, if you're looking for something that will help you leave a legacy for your son, let me recommend a brand-new book called Wise Guys. It's a unique tool that you can use with your son to help him discover the wisdom of God's Word and how it applies to the situations he comes in contact with. The book is divided up into chapters that highlight different character traits. It begins with a Bible verse, then a story that reveals the importance of the virtue. That's followed by discussion questions and suggestions for further study. It's just the kind of practical resource that parents are looking for. We're making the book Wise Guys available to those of you who ask for it, and the suggested donation for that is $13.

Call us anytime: 1-800-759-4JOY. That's 1-800-759-4569. You can also write to Gateway To Joy, Box 82500, Lincoln, NE 68501. And if you're on the Internet, be sure to check out our Web site. That address is gatewaytojoy.org. Gateway To Joy has been a listener-supported production of Back to the Bible.

Tomorrow Elisabeth talks about the importance of attitudes on the next edition of Gateway To Joy.