Elisabeth Elliot: Now I ask you, is there anything in the world more fulfilling than being a mother? Not necessarily does it feel fulfilling when you're up at three o'clock in the morning and your husband is snoring away comfortably in bed.

Lisa Barry: Does that ring familiar with some of you? Mothering can be very unnoticed and unglamorous work, can't it? There are no gold medals for faithfulness or nurturing...at least not in this life. And what about the mother who has neglected her church involvement because of the children? Should she feel guilty for not being more involved? Stay tuned for an interesting perspective by Elisabeth Elliot on mother's work, next on Gateway To Joy.

Elisabeth Elliot: "You are loved with an everlasting love." That's what the Bible says, "and underneath are the everlasting arms." This is your friend, Elisabeth Elliot, and I am so glad that I can talk with you again today on the subject of mothering.

Is there anything more fulfilling than being a mother? Not necessarily does it feel fulfilling when you are up at three o'clock in the morning and your husband is snoring away comfortably in bed. It doesn't necessarily feel fulfilling when you are emptying that diaper pail, or cleaning up the mess, or trying to deal with an intractable eight-month-old who has just learned to crawl and seems to be into everything.

Not that we are going to have soaring, ecstatic feelings of the beauty of motherhood at such a time, but all of us who are old mothers, we can tell you there is nothing like it. And those days with your children are really so short. Those years, they just fly by and there are so many conflicts in your lives.

I had a letter from a woman who was discovering many conflicts between her church duties, her home and her husband. Now this is an interesting question, isn't it? It raises the question of "How do we seek first the kingdom of God?" Is it more spiritual to work in the church than it is to work at home? Is it more spiritual to lead a choir than it is to peel an onion?

Well, this is the voice of Elisabeth Elliot saying, "No, it's not!" There is nothing more spiritual than the work that God has given you to do. And your act of spiritual worship is the faithful performance of the duties that God has given you.

If you're a wife, you know what your duties to your husband are. Do those for God's sake. If you're a mother, you know what your duties are as a mother. Do those for God's sake. And that's what changes a thing, you know. That is really what transforms the doing of ordinary, mundane work--the giving of that work to God, the making of an offering as you stand at your sink and wash the dishes or peel the carrots or clean up the floor. As you go up to the bathroom and scrub that ring out of the bathtub, and polish the mirror, and polish the chrome on the sink, is that spiritual work? Well, of course it is!

We get very high-flown ideas about what God is looking for; but you remember when God chose Moses and David, He chose shepherds, men who had been trained, prepared for the tough assignment of leading His people by leading sheep. And God has given to you precious, immortal souls that you are supposed to train for Him. "The job of a mother," as someone has said, "is giving saints to God."

Well, here's a letter from a woman who had this conflict between what looked like spiritual work and what didn't look very spiritual at all. She said:

"I was coming back from the doctor today when I heard the latter part of your program. It seemed to be aimed just for me. Let me explain. I have had this burden on my heart for quite some time now. I'm the mother of a four-year-old. I'm 29 years old. I'm expecting another baby in April. I have a couple of church duties that my husband resents. He says I put them before him and our daughter, and that I neglect them as a family. I have felt guilty about it for some time, but I didn't want to give up on God."

You see the subtle snare right there, thinking that by obeying her husband she would be giving up on God.

"I play the piano at church and I'm the organist. I continued my duties throughout my last pregnancy, and in a couple of weeks thereafter I was back to my 'duties.'" She puts duties in quotation marks this time. "I would lug my baby to practice for two hours every week, having to stop to feed or change her in the middle of everything. I felt really guilty and felt like a bad mother. My husband and sister-in-law also added to that guilt.

"On Sundays, or other church times, I had to rush around getting the baby situated so I could get to the organ. She has always been a fussy child, and my husband usually hated keeping her for that reason, and she didn't like the nursery. So I constantly felt pressured from these things and my husband to give up the organ and to be the appropriate mother that I should be.

"Music has always been very special to me, and I feel like it's the most important gift that God gave me." And may I put in a parenthesis right here, is the gift of music more important than the gift of motherhood? She goes on to say:

"But my husband is constantly pressuring me to quit, and I just didn't know what to do. I know the Bible says to honor and submit to your husband, but I didn't want to let my Lord down either." Strange conflict there, isn't it? "I feel like I am between a rock and a hard place. I have prayed about it and talked to the pastor, and he said that I shouldn't give up the music.

"I don't handle stress very well. I feel like I have come very close to a nervous breakdown several times. My husband and I own a small business, and you can't imagine how much stress that puts on me. I feel that everything is piled up on me because I work for free. We are struggling. We can't afford to hire all the help we need, and a lot of times we have to work late, and it's been hard with a child.

"Anyway, back to the church. I've gotten to the point where I almost dread church because of all the hassles--getting there on time, getting our daughter situated, finding out what songs we are doing. By the time I get there and up to the organ, I'm so exhausted and flustered that I feel I'm not in the right spirit to worship God. But I have often wondered if I'd be happy just sitting in the congregation like everyone else. I've played for so long. Many times I've wished I could just come to church, relax and enjoy it like everybody else and truly worship God."

There is another strange dichotomy. I think there is a failure there to understand what it means to worship God. If she's playing the organ, she couldn't feel that she was worshiping. If she could sit in the pew, she might be worshiping God but then she wouldn't be happy. You can see this poor lady is confused.

"When I heard your program today, you said something to the effect that I should put my husband and family before such duties that interfere with my role as a wife and mother. I may have misunderstood. I only heard the last part of it. Could you send me the manuscript or the tape of that program? I desperately need some help.

"Like I said, I felt like you were speaking to me because I had been praying about giving up these duties at least until my children are older, and one isn't born yet. The baby that's on the way is what I am concerned about. I can't imagine continuing these things after the baby gets here, and my husband has already said that he would not baby-sit while I practice.

"My singing group has almost ruined our marriage. We have argued more about it. He says I shouldn't do it, and I say I shouldn't quit God. He says I'm not doing it for God, that I am just pleasing others. There is some jealousy involved, also, with the people in the church. But like I said, I didn't want to quit God. I am afraid to. I am afraid He'll chastise me.

"Lately I have felt like the Lord was speaking to me, telling me that right now raising my children is more important. Being a good mother and wife should be my priority. My husband has constantly told me that my daughter is going to grow up resenting me for not being there for her. And I'm afraid he's right. Please forgive me for rambling. My thoughts are all jumbled up right now, and I can't seem to get them all together.

"I hope you understand where I am coming from. I need some advice as to what to do. I thought I would continue my duties until the baby is born and then give them up. I really hate giving up the singing. I have always wanted to play for a group since I was a child. I could always come back to it later. The group isn't really that good," she says. I couldn't help laughing at that one! "It was at one time, but there were changes and the group we have now just don't have it. That's another thing that is making me want to give it up--or is making it easier.

"So, do you think I'd be doing the right thing or not? You know, today I cried when I heard your program because I felt it was my answer to prayer. And all day I felt like a burden had been lifted from my shoulders. I told my husband about it, and he said, 'Praise God for that lady. She has saved our marriage.'"

Well, if there's anyone listening today that has that same kind of conflict in your life, please listen to the Word of God. The older women are to teach the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be keepers at home. That's the Word of God. That's not Elisabeth Elliot's considered opinion. So, if there does seem to be any kind of a conflict between what you thought you were supposed to do for God and what is so clearly stated in the Bible as your duty assigned by God, rest assured that there is no higher calling than that of motherhood. And may God give you the strength to be obedient.

I had a letter from another woman who said she had an unwanted pregnancy. She was desperate. "Where does God fit into this mess?" she said. "I have quit church. I have been betrayed by God. I'm responsible, but He could have prevented it or caused a miscarriage. I am bitter against Him. It's all a mistake." Well, you know, I had another letter from that lady. She said, "A thousand thanks, Elisabeth. The baby is born and I'm so very, very thankful."

So, I'm here to encourage you. Whatever your question may be about motherhood, I would hope that you'll find an answer from God. You know, we're not at the mercy of chance. It's a loving Father who holds us in His hands. It's the everlasting arms that are underneath.

May He give you peace today in your obedience to Him.

Lisa Barry: There are so many decisions we face as mothers and I'm sure today's program has strengthened you for the task. I've been so encouraged by her words that every task I do at home is a gift to God. It's my spiritual service because I'm serving my family, which He Himself has called me to do.

Something else God calls us to do is to raise up our children with biblical principles. And one book I've discovered that helps me do that is called Girl of Beauty. My daughter and I work on it together. Each day starts out with a certain character trait with supporting Bible verse. There's a story to read and questions to answer that help drive home the point of the lesson. "Precept upon precept," that's the concept here. And that's the kind of spiritual work that I love as a mother.

We're making Girl of Beauty available today to those of you who request it and the suggested donation is $13. Call toll-free right now at 1-800-759-4JOY. And the free offer is still in effect, so call now to get a complimentary copy of the poem "Father, Our Children Keep." That's 1-800-759-4569. Or you can write to us at:

Gateway To Joy, Box 82500, Lincoln, NE 68501. Our Web address is gatewaytojoy.org. Today's program has been a production of Back to the Bible.

Thanks for the encouragement you send through your letters. We read every one. Tomorrow, Elisabeth will talk about the importance of a mother's prayer time along with the whens and the how-tos. Join us then for the next Gateway To Joy.