Lisa Barry: Elisabeth Elliot gets many letters each day from people who love what she says, and from a few who take issue with her words. Today she's going to read a few of those letters and share what listeners are saying with regard to the subject we've been talking about so far this week. You'll hear a testimonial from a woman who lived for many years by the values of feminist ideology. Did that way of life deliver? You'll find out for yourself as we hear her story during the next 15 minutes.

So whether you're a staunch supporter of the women's movement or you consider yourself the farthest thing from it, Elisabeth will deal with it in a very thoughtful way. I hope you can stay with us for today's edition of Gateway To Joy.

Elisabeth Elliot: "You are loved with an everlasting love." That's what the Bible says. "And underneath are the everlasting arms." This is your friend Elisabeth Elliot, continuing my talks today about fathers and mothers.

There's been a lot of recent pressure on making fathers assume half of the responsibility of raising the children. Now this does seem to me to be quite unreasonable, given the fact that the man is the provider. To provide for a family is pretty much of a full-time job. I do thank God for the husbands and fathers who make time at home in the few hours that they do have to father their children and to be godly husbands to their wives.

But let's face it. Most men have to be away all day, every day. So if the man was designed by God to be the provider, the woman was certainly designed by God to be the principal nurturer. She's the one who receives the child, bears the child, nurtures the child, and if possible in today's world, she's at home.

You know that I urge women to stay home if they possibly can. I get letters from women who are deeply hurt by that urging, because they tell me that they cannot stay home. Of course, the Lord knows the truth of the situation. The Lord knows your situation. He knows exactly what you can and can't do. I'm not here to knock women who must work, but I do want to be clearly understood to be on the side of women who can stay home. I want to encourage you, because God knows you don't get very much encouragement, even from the church, let alone from the world.

Well, I have some interesting letters here. One man tells me that he was a feminist, a male feminist. He says, "I want to thank you for your words of wisdom and encouragement. You read on your program from the book ME? OBEY HIM? That book expresses very well the desire for peace that a man wants.

It was healing to my soul that other soft-spoken men are misunderstood as well. In my rebellion, I was an ardent feminist, until Jesus Christ changed my attitude toward my parents. I did not respect women or have any desire to protect them. I was a fool, but God changed my life and gave wisdom and knowledge and understanding. Oh, how sin messes up our lives! We don't need psychology or counseling; we just need the Word of God and repentance. Please continue to love the people that you minister to by your faithful rebukes and wise teaching. You are among the few faithful voices left out there."

Well, I hope that last sentence is not true. But I do thank you, Paul, for that very kind letter.

Now here's one from a woman named Karen. She tells me that feminism betrayed her.

"I'm 37 years old. I have been married for x number of years. I have some master's degrees and no children. When I graduated from high school, I was determined not to be trapped, as I thought, into a traditional role. I figured that I was smart enough to go to college and make something of myself and saw homemaking as a refuge for the intellectually challenged." Don't you love it?

"Well, I achieved my goals, including marrying a man who admired my intelligence and encouraged me to focus on my career. He was divorced and had children already. They lived with their mother. He was not interested in having any more children. Early in our marriage when I was having medical problems related to birth control pills, he got a vasectomy, to which I agreed, since I didn't have any great desire to have children.

So here I am, living the feminist dream, and I feel betrayed. My big career turned out to be singularly unfulfilling, and I recently left my job in order to be free to search for a more satisfying opportunity.

Although we can afford to live quite comfortably on my husband's salary and although the decision to leave my job was a mutual one, I'm now finding out that this man who admires my intelligence seems to believe that unless I have the high-rise office and the salary and the prestige of the workplace, I am a useless burden to society. He measures my worth as a human being and spouse in terms of the amount of my salary.

To make matters worse, I have been longing for children for years now, and my only consolation is that my marriage is so rocky that I would feel sorry for any children living in such a family.

It is has taken me fifteen years to realize that all I ever really wanted was 1) to be personally and spiritually fulfilled in my role in life, and 2) to be treated with respect and honor in whatever role I assumed.

I have always believed, and still do, that men and women are of equal worth in the sight of God and should be of equal worth in the eyes of humanity as well. The feminist movement took this basic truth and twisted it so adroitly that we grew to accept the idea that 'equal worth' meant that women should aspire to the same things that men aspire to. Traditional female roles were seen as demeaning, and therefore undesirable.

Men, bless their hearts, contributed to the attractiveness of the feminist movement by participating in the denigration of women, both at home and in the workplace. Women were definitely being treated unfairly. Feminism seemed to offer a way to fight back."

That's from a women who felt that feminism had betrayed her. She says, "I applaud the efforts of individuals, such as you and Dr. Dobson, in upholding the importance of the woman's role in the family. We all make choices based on a biased few that said women could either be successful or they could be mothers. I have as a consequence painted myself into a very lonely corner.

I realize that in pursuing the feminist role, I abandoned the feminine role, and thus deprived myself of the most profound and important role that a woman can have. By promoting the importance and value of women's traditional roles, you are helping young women to understand more fully the choices and opportunities that are available to them."

Well, I do thank God for the way His Holy Spirit opens people's eyes and they see how they have been sold a bill of goods. The feminist movement, for whatever good it may have done-and of course I believe in equal pay for equal work and I believe in women having the right to vote. But there's not much else about the feminist movement that I can applaud.

It is has caused all kinds of chaos. Men are not taking the responsibility at home or in the church or in society. I pray that you fathers who may be listening today may be encouraged to husband your wives and to father your children in a way that is going to mean sacrifice for you.

Of course it means sacrifice. You can't be out on the golf course every Saturday afternoon. You can't be down at the stadium watching the ball game. You will have to make some very tough sacrifices. I ask you, "Is it worth it?" What matters most to you in your life?

And now a letter from a woman who has certainly misunderstood me. She says, "How can you unequivocally say to every Christian woman, 'If you just obey and submit to your husband, I guarantee the Lord will save him'?"

I never said any such thing. I certainly have talked about obeying and submitting to your husband. That I have done many times. I cannot guarantee that the Lord will save him, nor does the Holy Scripture guarantee say that.

The Apostle Peter writes about this very situation, whether a man is either not a Christian or not behaving like a Christian. He speaks to the wives about what they should do. One of the most important things he says is, "they may be won without a word being spoken."

I think we can be fairly sure that no man is going to be won by a nagger. He doesn't want to hear your objections to his way of life. He probably has already heard them quite a few times. Peter refers to the great gifts, which are weapons that we women can wield against an ungodly husband. They are a gentle and quiet spirit, and prayer. There may also need to be forgiveness on your part.

This lady, who so grossly misunderstood what I had said, goes on to say, "Doesn't this place all responsibility upon the woman to perfectly obey, or else?" Of course, each of us is responsible to God for the command given to us. The Bible does not say, "Women, make sure your husbands love you as Christ loved the church." It does say, "Submit to your husband." It does not say, "Husbands, make sure your wives submit to you."

There's a command given to each sex, and each one is going to have to answer to God for his obedience or disobedience. It is not all the responsibility of the woman. It is her responsibility to obey and to submit, but it is the responsibility of the husband what may be the results of her submitting to him.

Lisa Barry: As we bring today's edition to a close, Elisabeth has given us a lot to think about, as usual. I want to do the same by telling you about a wonderful collection of materials we have available that are intended just for dads. It's called the Father's Day gift package, and we're offering this combination of resources at great savings to you.

You'll receive this two-week cassette series entitled ESPECIALLY FOR FATHERS that will encourage and challenge Dad and may impact your family for years to come. We're also including books he'll enjoy, plus leaflets that he can read on the run.

The cost for the package is $25. We'll even pick up the shipping and handling charge. Our address is Gateway To Joy, Box 82500, Lincoln, Nebraska, 68501. Or call 1-800-759-4JOY. Gateway to Joy has been a production of Back to the Bible.

Tomorrow we'll hear a little grandfatherly advice, so I hope you can join us then for Gateway To Joy.