Elisabeth Elliot: Are you crotchety? Are you miserable? Did you feel that you drew a poor hand of cards? Are you feeling sorry for yourself and saying, "Nobody comes to help me, or to see me, or to take me out"?

Lisa Barry: Well now, there's an example of a nice pity party. But you know what's funny about the kind of traits Elisabeth Elliot just mentioned? We almost always use them in regard to someone else. When was the last time you called yourself "crotchety" or "miserable"? Not lately, maybe never. The truth is we usually reserve that kind of talk for others when they are making our lives miserable.

But today on Gateway To Joy, Elisabeth Elliot wants to help each of us stop focusing on our own disappointments and on how we can serve others. Does that seem like an impossible thing? Stay with us to find out, as we begin this Thursday edition of Gateway To Joy.

Elisabeth Elliot: "You are loved with an everlasting love." That's what the Bible says, "and underneath are the everlasting arms." This is your friend Elisabeth Elliot giving you a little lightness this time. I've been talking on the subject of old age and this is also going to be old age, but I think you are going to enjoy this.

Do we old folks feel that we deserve to be pampered? Well, we can forget that; we can do something for somebody else. And many, of course, are incapacitated--but you can still pray. You can pray for others, and you can smile. You know that old song:

And I realize of course that being the sort of grandmother or grandfather whom your grandchildren love to visit, you are not always at your best and you wish you could be. Are you crotchety? Are you miserable? Did you feel that you drew a poor hand of cards? Are you feeling sorry for yourself and saying, "Nobody comes to help me, or to see me, or to take me out"? Remember what it was like when you had to visit somebody?

One of my listeners wrote, "Most of all I needed the mercy of God to have the heart to love my husband through it all. God gave me the strength I needed and to show mercy." Then she goes on to talk about choosing your attitude, which I've said quite a bit about on this program.

Somebody sent me this "From the Ladies of the Class of 1938":

"It is said that there are three ages of woman; youth, middle age, and 'you haven't changed.' But change is the name of the game. Consider: we were before frozen food, penicillin, polio shots, radar, credit cards and ballpoint pens. For us time-sharing meant togetherness, a chip meant a piece of wood, hardware meant hardware, and software wasn't a word.

"We were before pantyhose and drip-dry clothes, before icemakers and dishwashers, clothes dryers and electric blankets. We got married first and then lived together. How quaint can you be? We wore Peter Pan collars and thought a deep cleavage was something butchers did. We were before the white wine craze, disposable diapers and the Jefferson nickel.

"When we were in college pizzas, Cheerios, frozen orange juice and instant coffee were unheard of. We thought fast food was what you ate during Lent. In our day cigarette smoking was fashionable, grass was mowed, Coke was something you drank, and pot was something you cooked in. We were before day-care centers, househusbands, babysitters, computer dating and the term 'making out' referred to how you did on an exam.

"There were 5 & 10-cent stores where you could buy things for 5 & 10 cents. For just one nickel you could ride the subway or ferry, or make a phone call, or buy a Coke, or buy enough stamps to mail one letter and two postcards. You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $659.00, but nobody could afford that in 1938. A pity too, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

"We were not before the difference between the sexes was discovered, but we were before sex change. We just made do with what we had and we were the last generation that was so dumb as to think you needed a husband to have a baby.

"Now consider what we did in 1938 that college students today do not have. We had housemothers and big sisters. We had daily chapel and required courses in Bible, Speech and English Comp. We had hats and white gloves, maids and white tablecloths, linen napkins and candles; all long gone. We also had girdles with garters on them and petticoats and surge bloomers for gym.

"We mailed our laundry home in cardboard containers and it came back with brownies. We had fountain pens and bottles of real ink. We had stockings made of real silk, with seams up the back that were never straight. Unlike the remote-controlled dancers of today, we knew how it felt to have your partner hold you close and double dip. We had Toscanini and Edward the VIII and saddle shoes and cars with rumble seats. And when Ray Noble played 'The Very Thought of You' on his piano we melted.

"In the springtime of our senility we are misfits. We don't go in for consciousness raising or sensitivity training. We don't like to jog. We don't like pesto sauce. We don't know how to pump our own gas. We're not into veggies or yoga or Zen or funk. Our idea of a good time is to walk with a man, not jog with a Walkman. We seek silence in a day when silence is as rare as a Gutenberg Bible. The men we live with are our husbands and after 40-odd years they're still the same ones; how embarrassing."

I love that "From the Ladies of the Class of 1938." Well I was born in 1926, so I sure enjoyed that one.

Then there's this poem by Amos R. Wells called "Things":

Well, my friend Donna Otto says the problem is that women don't know how to make decisions and so they just continually stuff things in the back of the closet until they don't know what's in there, they don't know what's in the trunk of the car, and unfortunately they end up with too much stuff. And this goes to a traditional melody my radio listener Janet L. Janson has written, a melody called "Too Much Stuff" to the tune of "Three Blind Mice":

I think my voice is probably going to crack before I get through this one if I try to sing it, so I'll just read the rest of it. Stanza two:

Lisa Barry: I think we got a little bit of everything on today's program--a look back in time, a humorous look at the present and a challenge to stay positive when you feel like being negative. Being a pessimist is a dangerous slippery slope. Once we get started, one negative thought seems to uncover another and on it goes. Elisabeth's words have been a great reminder for me that bad attitudes don't just arrive on our doorstep one day, they are formed by the choices we make and by what we choose to think about.

Well if you are a grandparent, then I went to tell you about something that just might be the most significant thing you've come across in 20 years. It's a video done by Elisabeth Elliot entitled "Forget Me Not, a Grandmother's Influence." It's a serious message about how to leave a legacy for your family, not only that, Elisabeth offers many practical ideas to try. Things like writing letters to your grandchildren, keeping a photo album of your life to present to them.

Maybe you are listening today and you are not a grandmother, but you know one who would appreciate the video. To be sure there aren't many things you can give to a grandmother that she doesn't already have. But encouragement is something she will always need. To equip her with the ability to leave a legacy is a priceless gift. This week we'd like to make the video available when you ask for it.

Let me suggest a donation of $15.00 or more for that resource. Again, the title is "Forget Me Not, a Grandmother's Influence." Call toll-free 24 hours a day at 1-800-759-4JOY; that's 1-800-759-4569. Another option is to write us at:

Gateway To Joy, Box 82500, Lincoln, NE 68501. Please remember to include the call letters of the station you are listening to when you write. On the Web we are at gatewaytojoy.org. In fact, if you haven't visited our site lately you'll find many new enhancements that you are sure to like. Again, that address is gatewaytojoy.org. Gateway To Joy is a listener-supported production of Back to the Bible.

Tomorrow Elisabeth wraps up this series with an important message about the mercy of God. This is Lisa Barry, thanking you for listening. Please join us next time for another Gateway To Joy.