Strengthening Your Discipline of Prayer

In the past few weeks, we’ve looked at the importance of spiritual disciplines, beginning with the discipline of Bible study. This week, we begin to tackle the discipline of prayer—the discipline that I believe is the most difficult discipline to develop. I can “check the box” when it comes to Bible reading, choose not to eat a meal when fasting, and journal my thoughts each day without a great deal of effort. Regularly spending time with God to listen to Him and speak to Him, though, isn’t so easy.

That’s one of the reasons why I’m so captured by my spiritual heroes. I have five men to whom I look (two now with the Lord) when I think, “I want to be like them because they’re like Jesus”—and every one of these brothers in Christ lives (or lived) with prayer on his lips. Every one has walked as a leader from his knees.

Brother Jack so continually prayed that I went to him before making every major decision in my ministry while he was still alive. Jim started every class he taught with students on their knees—a familiar position for him. Al and Tom so pray that I don’t think I’ve ever been with them without prayer becoming part of the conversation; in fact, I run first to them when I have burdens that weigh heavy on my heart. Robert has mentored younger men for decades now, and he has drilled prayer into their hearts. By conviction and by passion, these brothers have challenged me to stay on my face before God.

That is hardly to say, however, that prayer is easy for me. My struggles have been several over the years, and I suspect they’re common, too. First, no one ever taught me to pray. I’ve learned what little I know by listening to others pray, reading the Word for models of prayer, and studying books written that prayer warriors have written. Still, I have a long way to go to reach the level of my heroes.

Second, I failed for years to see prayer primarily as relationship. Instead, I prayed because I knew I was supposed to pray. I prayed responsively when I heard about a need. I prayed almost ritualistically when it followed a common pattern, like praying before a meal or at the beginning of a worship service. Those times and ways to pray aren’t wrong—in fact, they’re all legitimate times to pray—but they can too easily miss the intimate relationship with God that makes prayer powerful and personal.

                  Third, I’m simply impatient. I want God to answer my prayers almost before I’ve prayed them, and I still wrestle at times with the waiting element of faith. The fact that I still wrestle is fascinating to me, simply because I’ve seen God answer prayers after many, many years of praying. I prayed for my dad for 36 years before he turned to Christ at age 71, and I prayed for my mom eleven years longer before she became a Christian at age 79. I know to trust God without hesitation, but still I wonder at times when God is going to respond to my next prayer.

I’ve so much still to learn . . . so much room for growth . . . so much to put into practice in this most challenging spiritual discipline. Nevertheless, here are some simple ways that have helped me strengthen my prayer life:

1.        Get some other prayer warriors to pray that you will pray. When you know that others who really pray are interceding for you, you’ll at least think more about prayer—and you’re likely to pray more. Their prayer will motivate your prayer.

2.        Pray in small segments of time. You might remember a recent post where I talked about a “secret” for doing disciplines well: start with 10-minute segments. I still have deeper times of prayer each day, but I’ve learned to delight in praying through the day this way.

3.        Use your calendar to guide your praying. Think about these possibilities:

·      For one week, calendar a different focus for praying each day. For example, pray for your family on Monday, your church on Tuesday, your neighbors on Wednesday, etc. Simply knowing what your prayer focus will be when you wake up will help you pray—and you might use this approach for more than one week.

·      When others ask you to pray for them, immediately calendar  time to do so. Often, the prayer request itself (e.g., a scheduled surgery, a job interview, etc.) will help you know what day to pray for the request. One of my prayer emphases today is a missions trip a friend is leading in a few weeks, and I have their departure date on my calendar.

4.        Pray as you read the Bible. Start by thanking God that you have access to the Word of God that millions around the world do not have. Then, ask God to show you something as you read. If it’s a promise, thank God for it. If it’s something that convicts you of sin in your life, confess it. If it’s a command, verbalize your commitment to obey it. Let your Bible study time become a dialogue between you and God.

5.        Send someone a prayer text each day. I have a friend who’s committed to sending prayers to different people each month, and I’m grateful to be one of those persons. He texts me to get a prayer concern, and he sends me his written prayer in return. I’m often amazed by the Holy Spirit-guided timing of his texts at just the right time in my life.

I know it’s not easy to pray. The devil doesn’t want you to pray. The world wants to distract you from prayer. Your flesh often doesn’t lean in the direction of dependence on God. Sometimes, we just have to fight to pray—but do fight, friend. You won’t regret it.